A day in the life of India

My experiments with Life

Home alone

with 13 comments

I know thts a cheap title, but then i m a man of cheap titles. As i mentioned in previous post parents are out, and i and my cousin will be living for some time alone. When a single person lives alone things are fairly simple all the works has to be done by him only, but when two people live, division of work becomes too complex more so with washing dishes..
Cousin goes to work so basically i m alone till evening, at 8 i just go out and sit at krishna’s(there will be a post about him later) place get updated on who is getting rich and who is getting poorer which kaam wali is getting fucked and many other news. Then R1 comes we arrange have to arrange for liquor since krishna’s stock is empty. Then we start drinking at around 9pm at 10pm my cousin joins us he also brings food. After drinking we all eat and go to sleep after doing some masti.. By the way r1 got tight yesterday and was singing loudly in the night, creating a jafa.
So what was happening was that nobody was washing the dishes and for the last 4 days bartans were piling up and it has become the size of donkey. Rite now my cousin is washing it 8.12 am. We were both thinking the other one will clean it and finally he gave up and started washing. R1 is still sleeping. i have always been an early riser. He wouldnt have washed but then i made some smart moves yesterday, i did the jhadu, and the dustbin was full as we had no idea where to throw them (for those who started following me recently, we have shifted to this house some 2 to 3 months ago). Only today we realised that a vehicle comes to collect the kachra. So when i was shifting the kachra to the polythene bag. What i saw was that all the food that got collected at the bottom had become shit, it smelled 10 times worser than shit, smell was quiet similar to shit but more like a shit of some alien. good that i controlled my mind and didnt add to the garbage by puking. So since i did 2 works he has to do some work, so since no other work was left he had to wash the dishes, i guess its gonna take 2 to 3 hours.
Day before yesterday R2 called, we have been kind of hiding from everyone that my house is empty because for obvious reasons – liqour shortage, we cant share that with anyone even with r2. More over he has his own place to drink and only on thursday he comes to drink with us now a days. R2 asked me if you can donate blood, i asked for whom, for gulab bhai’s wife. I said i cant man.. i will puke if i see blood going from my body. The last time i gave blood was when my mother was being operated for cancer, though the blood was never used i vomited a lot in the blood bank itself. That was too embrassing.. I can see other people’s blood but not my own. It gives chakkar and lot of vomiting after that.. he got the point and said its fine.
Yesterday R1 came in the evening and said do u know whats the latest news about R2, he continued i met K today and he yesterday went with R1 to give blood for gulab bhai’s wife and when they were taking the blood of R1 it was so thick that it took 45 minutes to fill 1 unit of blood and still the blood was of no use. Then doctor asked him as to what he has been doing, he said he drinks daily and doctor told him to stop drinking immediately else he cud even get an heart attack. I and R1 laughted at it, just thinking that he wont be able to drink and he will have to see those ghost (mentioned in earlier post – missing bladder) which will make him more madder will be fun to watch. Ya thts a bit cruel, but then the fun is too much in watching an hallucinating friend. Now what all things would be coming out of his ass we wondered. And we joked about the blooad taking too much time to reach his brain, thats why is doing such chutiya giris. We tried calling him and his phone was switched off. Actually R2 is someone who gets too afraid of things, watching him being afraid is just the funniest thing. But his anger is over the roof, he is short tempered so nobody tries to mess too much with him.
So we called him in the evening, and he confirmed that all those things happened and came to know that he has stopped drinking, and its good for him, he had become a pucca darudiya and is in a lot of financial trouble because of these. He has been drinking daily since he was 14. and it has certianly cost him and his family a lot not to mention even his bladder.
P.S. i know the readers wont be interested in reading my personal day to day shit, but then i m thinking tht i should write more on it, it will serve as a diary to which i can refer and enjoy when i would be unhappily married some years from now..

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Written by maya

August 7, 2009 at 9:55 am

13 Responses

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  1. One of the reason a blog can get famous is if it maintains a daily diary. So, go ahead and discuss your life (and take care of privacy too).And the fact that R2 has left daaru will make him more bladder-conscious! But then, will gulab bhai's wife be cured? Will stay glued to read more … btw, are you all into desi or the (vi)desi types?

    IdleMind

    August 7, 2009 at 12:13 pm

  2. Dude, you are a cheap pervert :PYou betrayed R2, poor soul, he is anyways, running short of bladder.Even I stay at home, all day, all night and believe me it is such a nice feeling, not to talk to anyone, not to see anyone, conservation of energy, you know πŸ™‚

    Tarun Goel

    August 7, 2009 at 12:54 pm

  3. @ idle.. may be thts true, but i m not sure,, but still have decided to maintain details about my life.. some day it might be of some helpgulb bhais wife will be healthy as gulab soon.you mean the liquor thing? its indian made videshi liquor. once tried the desi thing, liked the taste too but then R2 had once read a news article about how people went blind after drinking desi stuff.. so he was too fearful to try tht and he instilled that fear into us too… so even in extreme conditions we cant get the courage for the desi stuff@ tarun the good thing is that we dont have to betray him anymore.i agree with u, i too enjoy being at home. the shanti ki khoj ends at the very place from where one has started..

    Uncommon Sense

    August 7, 2009 at 1:18 pm

  4. You got that right! I meant the daaru. To be honest, the videsi brands in swadesh are good. As for going blind, I prefer to be neutral… LOL. But I have heard of other problems (in areas below the abdomen) for folks drinking desi too heavily!

    IdleMind

    August 7, 2009 at 1:31 pm

  5. @ doing anything too heavily will give a problem there, whether its drinking, working, thinking or any other thing.. actually mind still remains at the other place where as the attention is required at this place…when the mind is not in attention, how can the little member can come to attention position

    Uncommon Sense

    August 7, 2009 at 2:39 pm

  6. @ Uncommon SenseI agree with what IdleMind said at the beginning. A blog (derived from the word web log) should really be like a daily journal. And then, following the idea you propose, I am sure that this can be a very interesting read for you in future. Keep it going. DD

    D.Dasgupta

    August 7, 2009 at 3:05 pm

  7. tujse naarazzz nahi; zindgi..hairaan hun me.. hairaan hun me..honthose lagaaye huwe do aks apne,daaru samaj kar piye jaa rahe hai,kambhakhat, jeena hai to peena hai,so, amrat samaj kar piye jaa rahe hai 😦

    CrAzYy..! ;)

    August 8, 2009 at 12:17 am

  8. hehehe .. i actually like reading ur daily diary …keep writing πŸ™‚

    vicious

    August 8, 2009 at 3:45 am

  9. i sometimes wonder which is more interesting ..you , ur posts or the comments that follow πŸ˜› …

    vicious

    August 8, 2009 at 3:52 am

  10. For your little member may i suggest soaking it in equal quantity of vinegar, goats milk and honey every night.. in the morning wash it with extra strength lifebuoy. If you do this every day, even with all the daaru you will have no issues getting it to attention position.. hell you can even get it to attention position by looking at yourself in mirror πŸ˜‰

    Uday

    August 8, 2009 at 11:27 am

  11. @ uday thanks for the great advice i will forward that advice to someone else,, ofcourse i wont be experimenting with my dick.. i will ask someone else to do it and wait for the results…and do drop by here frequently, all ur suggestions would be put to practice..

    Uncommon Sense

    August 8, 2009 at 11:35 am

  12. @ vicious.. u understand me. and it feels very gd to have someone around who understands,, your comments are most valuable..

    Uncommon Sense

    August 8, 2009 at 11:44 am

  13. You are welcome, good idea trying it on a friend first. The first time i tried it the fellow turned red for a few hours.. i thought what the hell put somemore goat milk on it.. it then turned blue followed by orange and finally green its original color. It takes a few reps to get it right but once you get it there is no turning back.. your old faithful will thank you for it.

    Uday

    August 8, 2009 at 12:12 pm


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