A day in the life of India

My experiments with Life

Home Alone – some introspection and a tasteless biriyani

with 9 comments

Some times when you are alone at home; you want to be alone, without some friends dropping by every half and hour, some friends coming with porn cds saying lets watch this its cool stuff, some would recommend we drink the whole day (thanks for the shortage) some saying lets bring a prostitute, and some coming with his girl friend trying to take advantage of a safe place.. so there are many things that can annoy you. So being alone has to be kept as a close guarded secret revealed only to a few. If you are alone for 1 or 2 days its ok but then its 3 weeks.
The thing about movies and porn is that i always like to watch it alone, also one can masturbate to his hearts content by watching porn otherwise which has to be done in bathroom, one cud get bored of masturbating at the same place..
What one does when he is alone tells a lot about a person and his friends. There is this bachpan ka friend T. What he used to do was, he would call his friends they are all loveria types, all couples fill his home, they talk and eat, and would be cuddling each other and doing mushy mushy talking in every corner of his house. Then there is S he is a sardar he would bring prostitutes. Then there is our group core group is of us 3 and the extended group goes upto 10. So basically i dont allow or indulge in prostitute stuff, the thing is that thou i know there is nothing wrong in that but still i do only those things that i could look into the eyes of my parents and say “so what”. In my house drinking, smoking, drugs (in past, but if some one wants to try he can use it), cooking, coming with gf, doing tightgiri, shouting, fighting is allowed. All houses have their rules and they are not to be broken ofcourse my house is the most liberal one.
So whenever there is an empty house, R1 would say lets make biriyani. He had seen someone make biriyani, and he started making it and thinks he makes very good biriyani. But we are not sure… we wud cut onion and garlic and stuff and give him support services then he would start making. Nobody says anything because if they say, they will have to work too. So R1 takes all the trouble in making it, thinking that he is some great bawarchi.. and in front of him we wud say he makes great biriyani, but actually you cant call it a biriyani in first place, its more like rice mixed in mutton curry.
We sit with our whisky( yesterday whisky was not available so had to drink rum, man it tastes so bad) and he would go to kitchen every now and then checking if its being cooked properly by the time our whisky is over the food would be ready. I mentioned the biriyani as tasteless in the title not because its actually tasteless but none of us would remember what it tastes like, since we are at home and every one is going to sleep at that place itself we drink more than our normal quoata, so the next morning we wouldnt remember how it tasted like. Still nobody has any idea how it tasted but we assume it might be good because we at it all. So when we meet R1 next day its customary for him to ask how was the biriyani last night, we would all look perplexed wondering how it tasted and would say, oh man it was great..
So R1 lives in the impression that he is a great cook, may be he is or may be not.. i guess some day this mystery will get solved.
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Written by maya

August 8, 2009 at 10:47 am

9 Responses

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  1. What a revelation! the taste of biriyani will forever remain a mystery … hehehe. Of course, you can try that out on a day when it's dry. All said and done, I would love to stay alone … just myself and the home. No hard feelings, but then I was never a 'gang person'. 🙂

    IdleMind

    August 8, 2009 at 8:29 pm

  2. there is no such thing as dry here, and nobody i guess would b interested in biriyani without a drink..well i like to be alone too, but alone in a home gives a weird feeling if its for too long,, having friends around in evening is a good distraction.. not to forget the stories tht they bring with them..

    Uncommon Sense

    August 8, 2009 at 9:25 pm

  3. the best thing to do at home while alone is to day dream ..i enjoy it alot , the results are quite good i mus say … and anyways i read somewher that we need not feel guilty about our fantasies …

    vicious

    August 8, 2009 at 11:25 pm

  4. I would say you should have gone with the sardar .. brought home the prostitute, feed her some home made biryani and full-fill her. By the way this blog is funny as hell, keep up the good work..:)

    Uday

    August 9, 2009 at 12:39 am

  5. @ vici there was a time, when i was home all the time, not even for single day i went out, it was around for 6 months,, i just sat at home… no friends comming nothing, even not going out for haircut.. hair grew long,, too long.. i had become like a baba i guess..but i never day dreamed,, i kind of was thinking all the time..and all i did during those days watching tv all the time..@ uday.. bringing prosti home and feeding biriyani makes complete sense but some how,, i m not into it..u have got good taste, i m very happy to know tht u find this blog funny,i thought my posts are bland, i was thinking of adding more humour into every post, then i always forget, and adding something jabardasti kills the originality..

    Uncommon Sense

    August 9, 2009 at 12:39 pm

  6. Having lived alone for years, i know how exacty it feels like… its like – heaven!i dont have that luxury right now but whenever i am alone, i tend to read.. read and then read some more. there have been times when i have spent 3-4 days without saying a word and trust me. i have never been happier.i love.. just love being alone. i am lonely in the crowd.. never with myself

    Chhaya

    August 9, 2009 at 8:42 pm

  7. wah ji wah..interesting title..padhne me majja aaya.. R1 se milna padega.. biriyani chakhne ke liye 😛 (thoda juth to me bhi bol dunga ki..wah wah kya biriyani banayi hai :P)now i m requesting u to write a new post :"Home Alone – remix introspection and some music"

    CrAzYy..! ;)

    August 10, 2009 at 11:47 pm

  8. i live alone. It is the best. I like biryani but i mostly order it from outside. stopped drinking long time back. And i share your views on prostitutes.N

    Nothingman

    August 14, 2009 at 4:48 am

  9. When I am alone, I will try to cook for me and love do the things which I cannot do when ever one in the home.. Briyani is always a mystery and thanks for sharing your personal experiences..

    Its my life

    September 16, 2009 at 3:34 pm


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