A day in the life of India

My experiments with Life

my daughter – a love story

with 16 comments

I am a very ajeeb person and everyone who have ever met me, has said the same thing. And sometimes i am shocked by my own weirdness. So the thing is that i have been thinking about my daughter (btw in our village most old women pronounce a doctor as daughter). Now dont get excited about me having a secret daughter hidden from all, i m still single and i dont have any such daughter, what i m talking about is the future, the future when i will have a daughter or may be i wont, but i would like to have one. Small girls are cute arent they, not the small ones, who cry and shit(vici, chhaya i know i have mentioned shit, i m beginning to wonder how its coming in every post, it not written on purpose.) all the time but the ones who have started talking, i m not adding any age here because i have no idea at what age they start talking…
I have always thought relation between the father and daughter, mother and son is a layered one, i mean there are too many facets to it. The thing is that as the girl’s age increases the relation between father and daughter keeps on changing, mostly the distance between them keeps on increasing while that of son and mother keeps on getting closer, stronger. Father always love daughters more and mother their son. It has to do with sexuality, male and female attraction. (dont worry its not moving forward to an incest topic). Though there are exceptions in father and son relation where father loves son more than the daughter but its because of the society, and happens mostly in garibs world where sons are considered an asset and daughter a liability (krishna cried a lot when his second child also was a girl, but being in company of wise ppl like me, he has changed).
When we have a family of 4, brother, sister, mother and father its always the perfect one because sexually it gets balanced.
I coming to the title topic i picturise it like this . So i will have a daughter one day, a cute one with a pony on top of the head, then she would start going to school with two ponies, and she would go to college with one pony, and to the job without a pony. As the ponies change their position so does the relationship. The small girl who would jump on papa’s lap wouldn’t jump anymore because she knows there is a dick that might get erect, the girl who would cling to papa wouldn’t anymore because boobs have come between papa and her. As the boobs grow so does the distance between the father and the daughter (<– smart lines eehh?). For the father its always hard, the small child whom he had carried in his arms, the one who clug at his finger when walking, the times when he had stared at her beauty, the times when he had slept hugging her, the one whom he had kissed every time, the one whom he would ask for a kissi before giving a toffee has grown up, its no more her small child, he cant stare at her anymore, cant sleep with her, cant kiss her whenever he wanted, cant ask for a kiss for toffee. I can say it must be hard to see the distance growing, and the distance must have grown more, faster when the mother must have told him about her first period. The sad part is that there is never a reunion, the child doesnt come back, the one whom he had loved with all his heart. She now has a boy friend and he envies him, he is a competition, all the love of his child has shifted to him. He tries to stay away, he would cry in his dreams when the girl would say “papa dont preach me”, he would blame the americans when she would talk about privacy.., he would think twice before entering her room with dont enter written on the door, as he would knock ” i m busy” a sound from inside he could hear. she must really be busy he would think, but if he is a nut like me he would think “she must be fingering, talking to her boy friend discussing about what position they could try today at sanu ka ground after tuitions..
The avoidance is often from the child, during the puberty days, there is high repulsion towards the parents, and those are the days the parents love their kids the highest, this is an evolutionary stuff, its natural hate for parents that comes from kids so that it would be easy to leave them.. and chart their own paths. But the parents still love the kids as they had loved them when they were young, they still worry when you sneeze, thou they must be far off but still they wont be able to sleep as they didnt when you were young and sick, they worry a lot about us and we often ignore them, they worry when you are late, but you say “its my life” but we forget you are his life. we are annoyed at their care.. but we will realise, realise it one day when everything will be too late..
P.S. too long hun, hope i didnt bore u.

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Written by maya

September 29, 2009 at 11:46 am

Posted in uncommon

16 Responses

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  1. oo its not at all long ….it was so sweet n touching n soo true …u have so well analysed the relation ..but i have seen girls who even after growing up cling to their fathers , hug them , kiss them , sleep with them n what not ..now call it affection for their father , lack of sexual feelings or absence of a guy in that gal's life ..but there ARE gals who keep doing all sorts of stuff with their dads !!!!

    vicious

    September 29, 2009 at 1:36 pm

  2. @vicious – :O !! i frankly dont know any such girl. @ US – about father and dauhter relationship, the biggest gift a father can give to his daughter is the assurance that he will be there for her.. no matter what. that he will blv her words.. and that he will protect her. you have analyzed it well. including cliches. end of the day, we will get in return from our kids what we have given to our own parents. its the cycle of life and its gonna be repeated.PS: You are not ajeeb at all if u think of having a kid one day. PS2: why do u try so hard to paint a picture of u as being thie weird person?? LOL 😛 :)tc

    Chhaya

    September 29, 2009 at 1:48 pm

  3. @vici really, its gd to know that are such girld, but i have never come across any such ppl, but then i havent met much ppl… actually the mother herself will ask her husband or the daugter to avoid proximity.. thou i m not sure abt it..and thnx for liking the post

    Uncommon Sense

    September 29, 2009 at 1:50 pm

  4. @ chhayayes the cycle the cycle will be repeated. about proclaiming myself ajeeb, its bcas everyone says so, reason for mentioning ajeebness in relation to this post is that, actually i was going to write about something else, and since the first few lines wouldnt make much different i kept them instead of deleting,, it feels bad to delete something

    Uncommon Sense

    September 29, 2009 at 2:02 pm

  5. I feel the relation between father and his kids is the most difficult to achieve. Don't forget the mom will give the strongest and the loudest competition, often defeating the dad! heheLot of things keep changing in father's behaviour as the daughters keep growing. The sexual aspect that you write may be libido … though it doesn't always affect the dad, but is definitely difficult to contain as some dads have recently shown (raping daughters, torturing them mentally and so on).Being the father is the most difficult relation … since the attachment is not the umbilical chord (like the mom's). It's only the sperm, and he better know that very well … and a sperm relation doesn't count in a civilized world!!

    IdleMind

    September 29, 2009 at 3:24 pm

  6. @chhaya n US: i know its hard 2 believe .. but as IM pointed out some stories have become news as well !!!@IM : my father thinks exactly like you ..mom giving the loudest and the toughest competition …becomes difficult 4 men who have lots of emotion but 0 expression .. this loudest competition from mom is actually making up for the affection that the father has but lacks to show !!!!

    vicious

    September 29, 2009 at 7:04 pm

  7. haha…freaky mkl…saale mast post likhta hai…waise mai bhi sochta hun ki meri bhi beti hi hogi.

    abhishek

    September 30, 2009 at 1:01 am

  8. V for vendetta…one of my fav. movies. 10-12 baar dekh chuka hun.

    abhishek

    September 30, 2009 at 1:02 am

  9. Amen and thanks

    Tongue Trip

    September 30, 2009 at 1:07 am

  10. You are already thinking about kids???? Wowo!And I think all guys who write have to be weird… otherwise nothing interesting ever comes out… who wants the same boring mundane repetitive shit. coming to ur topic… well… i've never really thought of it like u have… but do u really believe in freud? that almost all things have a sexual tinge to them? no doubt it answers many things… but again… the thought of u wanting to have a daughter could be implying that u want to have sex with a girl to pro-create… but is that what it really implies??? i don't think so!

    AJai

    September 30, 2009 at 10:47 am

  11. @ abhishek : Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V. — Vand gd to know that u liked@ajai

    Uncommon Sense

    September 30, 2009 at 11:19 am

  12. @ajai.. freud takes the whole issue to the extreme, but i do beleive in most the stuff that he says, after freud too a lot of research proves that behind most of our seemingly non-sexual behaviour there is a sublime sexual intent..every species's primary goal would certainly be to propogate its genes, and i do believe it has been programmed into our dna but we as a species have evolved in such a way that sex has been masked, the face of our activity is different but ultimately the activity is an hidden effort towards procreation with a person with better genes..

    Uncommon Sense

    September 30, 2009 at 11:32 am

  13. @ idle agree with you, the relation is way too complex and layered

    Uncommon Sense

    September 30, 2009 at 11:34 am

  14. Wow! Though "those" words do seem to creep up in all of your posts, here the words add to the feelings more than ever! If that isn't weird, then nothing is. I really like the way you have analyzed the relationship between a father and daughter, the perspectives you provide are very intriguing and provide food for thought.Particularly I liked your narration of the facts of how kids tend to rule their own lives as they get into late teens. They think they know what's right for them. Also the one that describes how daughters distance themselves from the father (and mother) as they find their man is so very true, and the way you described it is very touching.Like you, I too dream of having a girl child but the darned Astrologer predicts from my Kundali that I will be "gifted" with son(s). I wouldn't speak too early about sons choosing their destiny and being defiant, and girls being obedient and "father-loving". Rather, I would wait and let the mystery unfold itself; be it son or daughter.In short, this was a wonderful post and the one that has brought up a lot of questions in my mind regarding behavior of children in general. It has scared the living hell out of me. I don't know if I would want to have kids! Touching description and narration of facts are highlights of this post.- Vittal

    Vittaldas Prabhu

    October 2, 2009 at 2:57 am

  15. @ vittal thanks for liking, astrolgers predictions i dont belive in much, bt i do like when they say gd stuff about future, so i do visit astrologers enjoy them its fun..

    Uncommon Sense

    October 2, 2009 at 10:33 am

  16. your post is scary. please dont have any children.

    Anonymous

    December 3, 2009 at 6:01 pm


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